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Sunday, September 28th, 2008
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5:48 pm - cookies
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I made peanut butter cookies. They get Scott's seal of approval: "These are good! They actually taste like cookies, not like the last ones you made. "
current mood: amused
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| Saturday, September 20th, 2008
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5:31 pm - octopus
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Hi! Scott and I went to the beach last Monday, the water is nice and warm. I found an octopus and a hermit crab! The hermit crab surprised me, because I was carrying it around for a while, thinking it was just a pretty shell that I was going to keep, until it the crab reached out and touched me. I told Scott some people keep them as pets, and assuming I wanted to keep it he asked me to let it go. As I put it back in the ocean, I said "alright, but if I find an octopus, I'm keeping it!" This is because, as I child, I decided an octopus would make a cool pet. They can change color, and are very smart, especially considering they are invertebrates. Moments after saying this, I found an octopus, half buried in the sand, near my bag. It was alive, I could tell that because it was moving and breathing. When it breathed, its whole head/body inflated like a balloon, and deflated, looking flat. Deflated it was about the size of a normal sized balloon with no air, but with arms. It did not look like it was feeling very well, so I put it back in the water. I tried to rinse it off, and get it wet, while still holding it, so I could observe it for a bit, but the waves washed it out of my hand. I would not actually have brought it home, because I do not have the set up to keep one alive.
current mood: cheerful
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| Friday, July 4th, 2008
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12:58 pm - GreyMalkin
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Hello, I'd like to ask everyone to please share your memories and photos of GreyMalkin. If you have high resolution photos, please email them to me at my hotmail address, which is the same as my username here. I want to share with the world what a good, smart little ferret Grey was. If you share something with me, I will send you a surprise in September.
current mood: peaceful
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| Sunday, June 15th, 2008
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10:43 am - Hundred baby Spiders in here.
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I was storing my bike outside, on the bike rack. Scott wanted it inside, so I brought it inside. It must have had a spider egg sack on it. Now the apartment has about a hundred little tiny, barely visible baby spiders. They are about the same size as the diameter of a toothpick, so just less than a millimeter, but gosh there are a lot of them. I don't tend to see them unless they are in a cluster or are right in front of my eyeballs, but they love to bite me. They sting for a second, then they itch me all day. I'm making an exception to my general policy of not killing spiders, but still, there are just too many.
Otherwise, things are spiffy. Scott and I are swimming everyday. (There are two pools right on our complex) The weather is wonderful. I'm doing pretty well learning Java (just been doing the examples in the book so far, but I think I'm ready to write my own simple programs today.) Money is kind of tight but we still have enough for rent and food. Gas is freaky expensive, over 4 buck per gallon last time we filled up, but I hear it's high in Maine too.
I saw a snake outside out apartment that looked like the closet snake, so I'm hoping it IS the closet snake, so now I can put stuff in the closet. I tried to get Scott to do it, but he just moved the stuff slightly closer to the closet. He says he is not afraid of the snake, he just does not want to make any animal, potentially poisonus or not, angry.
Even though everything is wonderful now, I still have bad dreams about living with my parents.
current mood: cheerful
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| Monday, February 18th, 2008
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2:40 pm - Hurt
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I'm very hurt emotionally right now. You might know I was very excited to start a new job, working with birds. A man named Richard Ranieri has nine endangered golden conures he wishes to breed as well as many other parrots and birds, and I was looking forward to taking care of them so much, I had my heart set on it.
The whole thing was too good to be true...
I've wanted animals to train and love for so long, and I'd have as many as I wanted there. In exchange for doing something I already wanted to do, we'd be allowed to live on Rich's land in his "cottage" (a small extra house on the land) and he'd pay for our utilities too. These are our biggest expenses, so we'd save a lot of money.
Not only that, but this is all in Sarasota, where the Mote laboratory and aquarium is. They have dolphins there, and I could volunteer there. I could make friends who loved dolphins and animals and learn more about dolphins, perhaps even help out with them eventually.
Sarasota is also home to a big cat rescue, meaning a rescue for big cats, which would be just about three miles from where our house would be. The land we would have stayed on was beautiful, 26 acres, mostly woods. I was looking forward to making a nature trail or two, and watching all the wild life. I wanted to camp outside at night and watch the stars. Rich said I'd also have free use of their in ground pool, which would be great, I wanted to practice swimming and other dolphin related things, like playing around with sound under water or trying to make bubble rings. Things I feel too silly to do in a public pool with people watching. And the neighbors had horses...If I ever have a chance to work with dolphins, one of the interview questions will always be "What experience do you have with large mammals?" If I could honestly say I had experience with horses, that would help a lot!
It was all perfect. We interviewed for this job back in November, expecting to get it in December. But it kept being pushed back because the current person (Chrissie) had not yet left. We needed to set things up. We needed to give our current landlord written notice we were leaving on a specific date. Scott needed to give his current boss a date that he was leaving and he needed to set up a new job in Sarasota and give them a starting date. We asked Rich to please give us a date in writing. He did that, he sent us a hand written note with his signature confirming us for March 1st, for that specific job and address. So we gave our notices to our landlord and Scott's current boss, and set up Scott's new job all based on that date.
Then this past Saturday Rich called us to say the whole thing was off. Chrissie could not find a new job or apartment and had started crying. Her parents did not want her to live at home again. Rich and his partner Abe felt bad for her and let her sign a new year long lease, agreeing that she could leave when ever she felt like it. They said we could still have the job if we took it when ever Chrissie felt like leaving. They said if we moved to a different apartment in Sarasota, Chrissie would lend us the money for the deposit, up to 700 dollars, after we had found the apartment. I don't think we can trust Chrissie to send that money. I don't think we can trust Rich to do anything he says he will.
We've been borrowing money these past months trusting that I would have a job in March. All these past months wasted...so much time gone. We could have been using that time to look for other jobs and apartments if we'd only known Rich could not be trusted to follow his promise with real action.
I've been crying, I've been heart broken. I feel embarrassed for telling my friends and family I'd found a job when now it seems I never really did. Scott said it's good we learned that Rich can't be trusted now, before we moved onto his land.
I'm so hurt, so sad and angry right now. Rich does not seem to even know he is hurting us. He sees it as a slight inconvenience for us only. He feels he is doing the right thing. He says he is a spiritual person. All I want to do is cry. This hurts so much.
Scott is a rock, I know I can always trust him. Because I have him, I think things will be okay. But it hurts so much to trust or depend on other people. What can I do? I was not expecting any of this.
current mood: betrayed
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| Monday, December 17th, 2007
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1:16 pm - Bird job!
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Yay bird job! We don't know when I start yet though...some time in the next two months. Even though just feeding the birds won't take too long, I'm planning to spend lots of extra time with them. :)
Know what's weird? I thought I saw a black lab hurt next to the road on the way here. We went back to look at it, to see if it was alive or dead, and it was not a black lab at all, it was a pig. I've heard there are wild pigs around here, but hadn't seen one. I don't like pigs. It was, in fact, dead. I'm glad it wasn't a dog.
Nicest winter ever. We've only had a few days chilly enough to require putting on a long sleaved shirt, and even then, those days ussually end up nice and sunny and warm. :)
current mood: bouncy
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| Thursday, December 6th, 2007
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4:04 pm - Florida
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74 F, sunny. Though it did get down to 55 F last night...not that I noticed, being asleep and all. It's days like this that I'm really glad we made the move. It looks promising that I'll get the bird job...I can't wait! There are going to be so many little birdies for me to love! :)
current mood: cheerful
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| Monday, November 26th, 2007
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4:15 pm - I dumb with computers
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I need someone to recommend a book or something. I'm doing well learning Java, it's a lot like C++, which I already kinda knew. I think the problem is I learned how to program years before I ever got a computer of my own. My parents didn't think buying computers was a good idea until I was a couple of years into college. I learned basic from my TI85, pascal in a highschool class, and took a C++ class in college. The Java book I've got now walks me through the programming concepts nice and slow, but then it says things like "put those three things in the same directory and make that your working directory" and such...such as the things with the PATH environment variables and DOS things, and they don't say how to do these things at all. I know I need some kind of book, but I don't know where to look for the kind of info I need. I've tried looking in those sorts of computers for idiots books, but they are way below what I need...telling me how to double click and how to minimize a window. Really, I'm very confussed. I'm sure I could be writing great programs by now if I knew where to look to get this sort of info. Help? Bah, this keyboard hurts me. bye!
current mood: aggravated
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| Tuesday, November 20th, 2007
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11:54 am - Dolphins on every street corner
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| Tuesday, November 6th, 2007
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2:42 pm - Andrew
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This is a stupid question, I'm sure, but what is my "PATH environment variable" and how do I add an entry to it? I've been playing in my little JAVA environment. Then I bought a book that said to compile and run my programs right from the command line. Okay, I know what the command line is, and the book tells me what to type (Things like "% javac" and such, but the little DOS window doesn't know what I'm talking about. I don't even know where my PATH environment variable IS, let alone how to add an entry to it. The book has all this detailed information, it walks me through how to write a freakin' for loop like I have a brain tumor, but it just assumes I know how to do this PATH thing, so it must be something very simple... I tried google, but I'm still confused.
current mood: confused
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| Monday, November 5th, 2007
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2:25 pm - Sky brains
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A sky brain searches for synapse rich brain matter to add to its growing mass. These are, of course, a constant threat to yours truly. Scott thinks perhaps it was actually just an alien space ship in disguise. It's fall here, and it's finally getting cool enough to take walks (It's been around 82 F here today). Normally, biking is fine, because bikes create their own breeze, but walking can get very hot and sticky. I think I will not ride to Sebring any more. Last time a pickup truck came to close to me and honked at me, and also, while I was pushing the bike, two guys with shaved head and tattoos slowed down next to me in a while van and asked me if I needed a ride. Perhaps they were just being nice, but I think it more likely that there are just a lot of people around here who would be happy to murder me. I think I will just stick to going to the library and otherwise just not leave the house without Scott. I've been renting lots of horrible movies on Netflix, with an AI theme. "Colosus: The Forbin" Project was just dull. "Android" was MST2K style bad. My boyfriend loved it. He watched the whole thing, then watched it again with commentary. With commentary, it was even more like a MST2K episode, but with out rehearsal and effort. "Robot Stories" was a GOOD MOVIE. The first good movie I've managed to rent. It's four stories by one director; you watch them in order, they have a certain flow to them. The second story, "Robot Fixer" made me cry. All of the movies give one something to think about. It was all done on a low budget too. (It was an independent film). Scott and I both liked this one. I also rented some non-AI themed movies, including the Adventures of Mark Twain, which was just very strange. Any recomendations? Oh, Survive Style Five Plus was good, didn't rent that one from Netflix, it was something Scott found before we moved, but I liked it.
current mood: cheerful
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| Monday, October 29th, 2007
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5:36 pm - Picture of the day
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I took this today, it's a spider, but I have never seen one like this before. It is not as big as my picture makes it look. Its smaller than a dime in diameter.
current mood: creative
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| Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007
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7:16 pm - Ponies, Intro.
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I got permission to work with the horses my employers own, and their son JJ provided me with some information about them.
Curly: Retired racehorse. Old. Thoroughbred. Used to be ridden but not anymore. Head shy. Fur worn off in some places under his bridle.
Sundance: Pony. Born right there, they raised her from a foal. JJ tried to ride him once, but he bucked him off. Sundance is 16 years old and has never been trained to do anything.
April Lightning: 15 years old. Also born there and raised by them. She has never been ridden nor been trained.
Peter: Peter is a goat.
All of them will go back to their stalls freely, because that's where the food is. Their owners, rather than take their bridles off and put them back on as needed, leave them on all the time.
I've been feeding them carrots for about a week, and they are all friendly towards me, or at least, they come over to me to get carrots.
The ponies chase Curly away when he tries to eat the carrots. The goat, surprisingly, seems dominate over all of the horses. He can chases any of them away, despite his size. I think this is because he has weapons growing out of his head.
Yesterday I attempted to get April Lightning to learn a tongue clucking sound means "treat". She didn't seem to get it. I may need to use a more distinct sound, like an actual clicker. I also groomed her a bit. She was very pushy to get the treats.
Today I got on their side of the fence. The weren't afraid of me, and came right over to me. They are rather big. They kept curly away, and tried to keep the goat away. I didn't bring any treats on to their side of the fence. They stood on either side of me, and both competed to be groomed. They really seem to like that, I don't think they've been groom in quite a while.
Anyway, I hope to clicker train one of the ponies this summer. I intend to record my progress here. We'll see how this goes.
Dream alert: Also I had unending horrific nightmares last night. Mostly about being blended alive, feet first, being reconstructed and knowing it was going to happen again, and being helpless to escape. This repeated four times, but it wasn't four different dreams, it was because of the struggle between those who wanted people alive as individuals and those who wanted them blended. Also one about scary albino army guys beheading people...people begging for their loved ones to be spared...I think the albino guys were the ones who set up the giant blenders... they blended everyone in the dome and then combined the bits of their brains to make one really big brain that was unimaginably intelligent. They wanted it to do "dome work" for them. (I think more than one city was inside a dome. ) The first time the dome exits slammed shut, I was in a panic, trying to get out, or hide, and there were simply too many other people...crowds of people, trying to get the exits open and crowding around, not knowing what was gong to happen. Being blended was horrific. Seeing the blades getting closer and closer...and even though dream pain is not intense (unless I'm actually in pain anyway) it still feels really awful...hard to describe. Then finding myself alive again...all I wanted to do was get out of there. I didn't want to trust any one, I was sure that things would not be alright. It seemed impossible. When I was betrayed by two friends (even though I'd just met them in the dream, it felt like I'd known them a long time) and saw the machines again, all I felt was dread. By the time the exits shut a forth time, I was helpless, miserable, and some what resigned.
current mood: accomplished
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| Friday, April 27th, 2007
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5:22 pm
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Ruffy was in the basement all alone yesterday and I completely forgot he was there. No one told me the person who cleans quad 3 is suppose to take care of the basement cats too. I keep screwing up. I cleaned elderhostel today for the first time, and then quad 3. So many cats. Everyone else was finishing and going home and I was still there, completely overwhelmed and in some amount of pain besides. I didn't want to be there alone after everyone else had gone, I don't know why. I asked Leslie for help and I could tell she really wanted to go home, she gets there very early. She sighed and reluctantly helped out a bit, no doubt she was tired. That's when she reminded me about Ruffy. She went to take care of him and it was about then that I just started sobbing. I can't work as fast or as long or perhaps even as well as the others, when it comes to this sort of work. I was there just dreading each and every motion, every cat box, every stain in need of scrubbing, every bend needed to scoop up clean litter from that damn deep bin, every breath tainted with chemical cleaners, every cage or cat tree that needed to be moved and moped under, every surface I needed to climb to reach, every cat hair stuck in my eyeball; god why can't I keep them out of my eyeballs? Every plume of dust from that cheap clay litter making me sniffle and sneeze. There's so much to do, over and over. It's overwhelming. I feel worthless.
current mood: miserible.
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| Thursday, April 26th, 2007
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7:17 am
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I've been feeling down the past week or two. I feel like I can't meet anyone's standards.
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| Sunday, April 22nd, 2007
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7:58 am
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I was really happy to find a job that I could handle, in terms of anxiety. The people are so nice, and it's low stress in emotional terms, though I do get in a tither trying to make sure everyone does everything the way it is suppose to be done. The day before yesterday Calvin noticed that Clair had forgotten to give Snickers a water bowl...she went 24 hours without any water. Now I check on all the cats to make sure they have water, and such.
But in terms of physical stress I don't know how long I'll be able to do this job. This is the job: Clean a cat condo, give cat food and water, clean another cat condo, repeat for eight hours straight. There is really nothing else to be done. It's all cleaning cat condos. The problem is the job involves a lot of bending and skooching down, and my lower back and the joints in my knees are hurting a lot. Yesterday I had to leave early because my lower back was hurting so badly, and the pain was shooting up and down my left leg to my lower back. I tried to keep working, but it eventually got unbearable.
Scott says I'm just doing the job wrong, and I need to do it without bending. But it's necessary to crawl into the condos to clean them, at least with one's upper body. Consider the condos' height, width, and depth. They are deep, one has to reach far back to scrub the back shelves, and the height of each is broken up by cat shelves that one has to crawl under. The cat shelves cannot be moved. For the portable cages, one has to get down on one's hands and keens to clean them.
I haven't had back pain for years now, not since that summer which involved blueberry raking. Yesterday, I talked to my coworkers Calvin and Clair to see what they did to avoid back pain. Calvin says he pays 65 dollars per session for accupuncture, and that it only took 8 weeks of therapy to cure his back pain. Also, he is looking for a different job. Clair does not work often, but she said that after a day of working there, her back takes a few days to recover; of course, Clair is old. I don't want to ruin my back...I want it to last my whole life...I'd like my knee joints to last too.
It was finally so nice yesterday. I hated being in too much pain to go out and walk.
current mood: sore
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| Monday, April 16th, 2007
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9:49 pm - Sleep machine day!
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Scott finally got his sleep machine today. It's actually called a bi-pap, but sleep machine sounds nicer. I noticed his sleep apnea nearly two years ago. He would snore loudly, and then just stop, not breathing at all, and then many seconds later gasp for breath, and then repeat the whole cycle. When I told his doctor about it, we found out he needed a sleep test. Those cost about 2k, and Scott was uninsured. Hannaford only offers insurance in November, so we had to wait until then to sign up, and longer for it to kick in. Then set up an appointment with Scott's doctor, get referred to a sleep specialist, wait another month for a sleep test, and yet another for the results, all to tell us what I already knew through my powers of observation and google: Scott had moderately sever sleep apnea. Then, and only then, could we do something about it. Schedual another sleep test to find the right machine and the right settings and the right mask to help him. Then we waited to get the machine, and now, finally, my sweetie love can sleep AND breath at the same time. All of this is going to cost thousands even after the insurance. ONE sleep test cost 850 after insurance, and it cost over 500 for the doctor to interpret the test results. If sleep test number two costs the same as number one, that's over 2,200 right there and we aren't sure how much of the machine cost will be covered. The machine is 4k before insurance, and the mask is 300. It will all be worth it though. The doctors we've talked to have said that people with sleep apnea who are finally able to get restful sleep often experience improvments in other conditions such as depression, which Scott suffers from greatly, and concentration problems, and fatigue, all of which are problems for Scott. We're looking forward to all of this improving. I am SO looking forward to all of this improving. I want Scott to have energy and enjoy life, and look forward to things instead of dreading everything.
Oh, update: The girl I was referring to as Barbra is actually named Shawna, Barbra is someone else. I met them both yesterday and I'm bad with names. I have, however, learned all the cat's names. I like to sing a song about each cat as I clean his or her condo.
I let Tigger out today, because I felt bad for him always being in his cat cage. The cages are big, bigger than Grey Malkin's cage, and they are cleaned and sterilized every day, and have cozy beds, but still, I wanted to let him out while I was cleaning it, at least. Peggy came and put him back. Tigger can't have normal cat food, and though I was careful to be sure no cat food was on the floor before I let him out, while I was busy cleaning his cage, he was sticking his paw into another cat's condo and grabbing bits of food. I hope he doesn't get sick, he's such a sweetie. I feel bad. I'd like to give him a toy, but I have to make sure it's something he can't eat. He'll even eat the paper bowls the other cat's get their wet food in, which is why he gets his food in a special glass bowl. Poor Tigger. I wish I could adopt him, but then we could not leave Nuveena's food out, and even if we hid that, there is still always paper around, and Grey spills food out if her cage, and Bibi spills seeds on the floor...I can't see how anyone could keep him outside of a cage...like many cats, he will never be adopted, he'll stay there his whole life...he's very well cared for...there's no where else he could go to get so much care every single day. Certainly none of my pets takes so much time to prepare food for and clean up after.
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| Sunday, April 15th, 2007
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8:16 pm - New Jorb
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Well, I'm officially 29 as of last Thursday. My sweetie-love took me out to eat and bought me flowers for my birthday. ^_^ So, Thursday I applied for a job at a cat-boarding facility. (Uber thanks for making me that resume, Jen-chan!) Friday they called me and asked if I could start on Saturday. So I worked yesterday and today. It's hard work, constant motion, and one has to clime inside the big cat condos to clean them properly. Things surprise people that shouldn't:
Tarsha: Yay! I got a job at a cat-boarding facility! Surprise: Gee, I sure do have to clean up a lot of cat vomit, and cat urine, and other cat products.
Scott: Yay! I'm so proud of you for finding a job at a cat boarding facility! *hugs* Surprise: Ew. You sure are covered in a lot of cat hair. Tarsha: And other things. You may want to change your cloths.
Tarsha: Yay! Every room is filled with cats! As soon as I sit down, I have a cat on my lap. ^_^ Surprise! Tarsha trys to eat a sandwich: -_-; I cannot keep the cats off my lap.
I'm also surprised when the floor I just mopped is slippery. And when the cat who was so happy to get out of her condo or cage does not want to go back in. And when I bang my head on the cat-shelf I've just crawled under for the fifth time while cleaning identically constructed cat condos.
While the deluxe cat condos are occupied by cat's with paying moms and dads, many of the cats in the building are rescues whom Peggy and Rick have taken in out of the kindness of their hearts. Many off these cats would have been put to sleep because they are so difficult to care for. Some are very old, some of been victims of horrible cruelty and are permanently damaged physically, and I can only suspect, mentally and emotionally. I cannot believe what some people will do to cats, and of course, we only have the ones who were lucky enough to survive.
Two cats, Janis Joplin and Tigger, cannot even be allowed out of their cages. They were rescued from and animals hoarder who had over 70 animals, and could not feed them. Their metabolisms were badly damaged. All ordinary cat food left them chronically ill, so they are feed twice per day a homemade mix of human-suitable chicken and rice spiked with stool-binding medicine. All day they meow about being hungry and lonely, even when they have just been feed and petted. I cannot stop thinking about them. I would like to see them happy.
Oi, this is annoying. Every cat has a card on his or her cage or condo telling of his or her needs, such as which food they eat. Special needs such as medicine are highlighted brightly. I was told to always take the time to read the cards, so I do. Today, Barbra started working. I noticed she worked very fast, so I went around after her checking for oversights, checking to make sure, for example, that the cats who refuse to drink water if it smells unfamiliar got filtered water (They didn't) and that the Smokey who was supposed to receive laxative and no wet food didn't get chicken and stool-binding medicine mixture destined for the other cat named Smokey. (He did). Lesly took all the blame for that, but Barbra could have avoided it by reading the card. Yes, both cats are named Smokey, and yes, if some one read the card, and did something else for a while, and then came back, it could be very easy to forget which one was which. Which is why one should read the card again. There is a difference between making a mistake and choosing not to take the time to avoid carelessness.
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| Sunday, April 1st, 2007
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4:44 pm - I'm blinding you with science.
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I thought I'd briefly share some science flavored goodness I've come across recently with y'all:
Scientists discover huge, nearly perfect hexagon on Saturn! Scientist are baffled by the geometric figure, which is nearly two Earths wide.
Miracle fruit makes sour foods taste sweet! Eating a single, small miracle fruit berry coats the tongue with miraculin, a natural protein which stimulates the sweet receptors on one's tongue when sour foods, like lemons and limes, are eaten. The effect lasts about 1 hour.
Scientists create human-sheep chimeras who's organs, including it's brain, are made up of 15% human cells! Scientists create mice with full color vision, such as humans have, by adding human genes to their DNA!
A new species of leopard is among the 52 new species found in Borneo since last December.
Isn't science exciting? :)
current mood: chipper
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| Monday, March 19th, 2007
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7:52 pm - First thoughts
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A few days ago I was out walking and a saw two woodpeckers making a hole in a tree. These are large black birds with red feathers on their heads. My first thought was that they were crows wearing tiny hats. This sort of thing is why I usually disregard my first thought by default.
current mood: spring time current music: Bibi the happy parakeet
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